she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
