i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
