Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize