Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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