The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
