I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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