Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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