would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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