I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize