Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Randomize