he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
