Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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