u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I touched a dick in church today
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
