Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
