finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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