that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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