Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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