Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
