I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
