One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize