he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Randomize
