What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We have started to decorate penises.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
