You work out of a Hotel?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
