I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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