I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
