I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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