my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
