I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize
