winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
