i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
