lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
