Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
