Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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