I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Randomize
