Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Just pee around me
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
You ruined the universe
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
