i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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