yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize