i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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