I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
