So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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