Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
