I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
