i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You've changed since you got that strap on
I supernannyed him into submission
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
