What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize