Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
