# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
