remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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