I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
