My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
