I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize